...And then that sumbitch kicked me down a well or some shit. I landed in some puddle or something, and as soon as I looked up saw a bunch of weirdos running away in all various different directions. the closest was a fish, some kind of red thing or whatever, and he was just flopping away all scared like. so I picked the thing up, and immediately he started screaming, this fish was totally just talking to me:
"No, no! Don't hurt me!" And I didn't know what to do, with this talking fish or whatever. So I was like,
"What the hell are you?!" And almost dropped the fish out of my hand. And then he was all like, OH I'm a Red Herring or whatever And acted like I was supposed to know what that means, Like he's all big and shit. So I told him,
"Hey I'm Randall Parsons" and it was weird 'cause like, what, I'm friends with a fish or some shit? And the fish said it was nice to meet me, but that he'd never heard of me. So I was about to say something but then this voice from behind me chimed in, "Hey Irony, you ever heard of a Randall Parsons?" Then this guy kind of in the shadows in front of me says, all sarcastic like,
"No, I've never heard of him." But he looked kind of familiar so I wasn't sure if I knew him or not, or if he was serious. Then I asked the fish,
"Who was that other guy?" and the Red Herring told me the first guy's name was Frame Story (Which I thought made him sound like an old movie gangster or whatever) and that he was always interrupting, and sometimes jumped ahead. I didn't need these guys' life stories and all, though, so I was just like,
"Dude, fish I just wanna go home, man." And then some little skinny guy came running over and was all like, Hey don't you wanna know how you got here or you know what happened or how this place came to be and shit but then that Red Herring was all,
"No, not now Exposition, I gotta get him out of here!" which was cool he was on my side and everything. But then I didn't know, 'cause he led me down this tunnel that had a sign that said "Dead End", and It just feels like I'll never get out of here. I don't know what's going on, which sucks, cause if I don't write this essay for English class I'm totally screwed.